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Mindfulness helped me to be able to combine the two: a pause and no judgement. That was okay, because I understood where it came from and I wasn’t being judgemental about it. For the first time in my 16 years of dating and relationship history I am in a relationship that feels good, solid, respectful and, most important, where I feel love. At the same time, I understood that if I was in charge, I could probably also put a stop to it.

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